Get Naked

Thanks Kathleen! You are amazing!

Kathleen decided to surprise me by buying me some stuff and then throwing it all in my car while I was at work yesterday. You know she knows me well if she knows I rarely lock my driver's side door. (It's a pain to unlock since a tow truck guy effed it up one day.) But she didn't stop and say hi. She just threw the stuff in my car and left. So I didn't even know she had dropped by. What's really pathetic is that I didn't notice the huge Sears bag laying in my passenger seat when I left work. La da de. La de da. I just got in my car and headed over to the bookstore totally oblivious to the fact that a huge Sears bag had magically appeared in my passenger seat. Ok now, I guess I should stop ranting and raving about all of those stupid women I see who walk around unaware of their surroundings, huh? Here I was, I drove to Scrabble and then all the way home as well, and I never noticed that there was a big huge plastic bag sitting in my seat. Osama bin Laden could have been sitting in my car for all I'd known. Damn tunnel vision.

Kathleen went to a movie and called me around midnight, asking what I thought of the dress. "What dress?" Doh. Of course Kathleen had to point out that if my car hadn't been full of crap I might have been able to see the Sears bag. Damn, and she caught the car during a clean streak. Heck, I didn't even get much razzing from younger Matt about it last week. I knew it I could call it clean then.

Will I ever live this down? To think, Kathleen still tells everyone how I called her out in front of everyone in the libby one day. She was working for me one day, sitting all the way across the room typing on a computer next to a friend. She called herself a libby, and I said, "Excuse me, I worked long and hard for my degree. You are a libby assistant, not a libby." I barely even recall doing that. Oh well. Now I'm the one, the only, the blind, clueless libby. And an Osama-smuggling libby for all I know. I can hear Kathleen calling me all of these things now. Payback is hell. ;)

So what'd she buy me? She bought me a dress, a pair of earrings, and a necklace at Sears. All for $15. Holy cow! She left the receipts to prove it. The dress is really pretty; I've received a zillion compliments on it today. It's a tad long though. I keep stepping on it. But that's not the best part. The dress is just long enough to be alluring to my chair. It's acting like a little baby in the arms of a long-haired woman. Yank. Yank. It keeps rolling over my dress and then chomping on it and tangling it up in the wheel. It's made for an interesting day. I need to have an immediate growth spurt or else I'm going to have to get naked to get disengaged from this damn chair. And this just happens to be another one of my lovely 13-hour work days. Joy.

So all together now...let's sing "Get naked" while I roll the chair over to the door. Gotta close it so I can have some privacy. Damn chair.